Family trip to Disneyland . . . . well not quite, but close enough

The other day at work, whilst standing in a group, bored out of our brains, waiting for ANYONE to walk through the door and give us something to do, we started talking about roller coasters and scary rides we had been on (for me it was my past experiences watching everyone else plummet from ridiculous heights whilst I gallantly held all of the bags, hey - its an important role within the group dynamic, stop judging me) and the boys came up with a brilliant idea to co-ordinate everyones days off and have a day trip to Thorpe Park (For all the Aussie readers, you are probably pulling the "huh?" face right now, just like we did . . . Thorpe Park is the UK version of Dreamworld).

After some secretive planning, roster fiddling, car coordination, poor directions, traffic jams, strategic parking, lining up in the million people deep ticket queue, busting out with our buy one get one free vouchers and loosing one of our crew in the security gates which closely resembled the customs section at the airport (I told him not to try and smuggle in his ridiculously large joint, but of course he didnt listen, lesson learnt - HA) we were finally standing in the land of screaming, spine-tingling, stomach churning FUN ready to tackle these babies . . . .

After lining up for insane amounts of time next to the smelly kid with no friends, the young couple who spend the whole time trying to fit each others faces into their mouths and the poor guy who just wanted to be cool for taking the kids to Thorpe park but forgot he has to go on with the them and is now crapping his dacks  and was clearly looking for ANY escape route possible, there were a few moments spent shooting from crazy death defying heights, backwards, upside down, and wrong way around, with your fingernails now permanently impressed into the safety bars at speeds unnatural to man, resulting in you're voice turning into that of a 2 pack a day smoker

. . . . . . . . . .  followed by lunch and a few beers




Jess and Halz werent all that keen on the whole 'scaring the poo poo out of you' rides, they spent thier ride time on things such as the hardcore 'Tetley Teacups' followed by a 3D movie and a wander around the gift shop

YEA BOI - HARD MOTHER TRUCKERS!!!

As the sun started to fade away, Ant and Matt decided it was the perfect time to go on the 'Tidal Wave' . . .  now lets just take a moment to think about this - its getting dark, it has been overcast and rather chilly all day and it wasnt about to get any warmer and this particular ride has been constructed for the pure purpose of getting you 110% absolutely soaking wet


Resulting in this . . . . .

NOT HAPPY JANICE

After wandering around the park soaking wet for the next few hours it was time to head home . . . . . heading towards the exits we hear a big booming voice over the Announcement Systems that there had been an accident on the motorway and as a result there were massive traffic jams all the way home. Just my freaking luck, im all soggy, my wet jeans are clinging so hardcore to my ass it feels like im all wrapped up in cling-wrap, im exhausted, hungry and cold . .  what more can go wrong??

Luckily, the boys knew the best remedy for waiting for traffic to clear - Find a pub, grab some food and finish the day off with a couple of well earned pints

All in all, a great day! Not really the best suggestion for the socially awekward, pregnant, those with back problems, midgets/small children or those universally referred to as "PUSSIES" - but for all the others out there, DO IT, YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO - www.thorpepark.com

Fearless bastard - over and out