Apart from eating Vegemite by the bucket load and walking around the house in my thongs, what more can I do so far away from home?
Yesterday I managed to say "its well hot in here" and almost died at the thought of picking up on their horrible distortion of the English language, I immediately corrected myself and then shut my mouth for the rest of the day.
Now when I talk to customers they dont look at me with that "You're not from around here" expression anymore, instead I must seem normal to them, which concerns me as my Australian-ness was so obvious to them in the beginning.
Today Hayley got out all the Australian Souvenirs and "Best of Australia" posters and hung them all around our room, it looks like a bloody gift shop in here. She even went as far as attaching those clip on Koala's to all the hanging light fittings hanging from the roof . . . . . its boarder-lining on creepy
When trying to top up on Australian normality here we always seem to find a problem that gets in the way
A Meat Pie - pastry is different, tastes nothing like the ones at home
Choccy Milk - Tastes like UHT milk and home brand cocoa powder
Bacon - Its all smoked here, and its sliced super thin and has the texture of smoked salmon
Steak - No-one here can cook a steak properly, let alone identify a nice cut of meat, every one we have tried has been cooked badly and is super tough, give
me some Aussie beef anyday
Beer - I am yet to find a beer that doesnt taste like horse urine here, NOT HAPPY JAN
Aioli - These weirdos look at us strange when we ask for aioli, they have no idea what it is
Tomato & BBQ Sauce - they taste nothing like our sauces, how do these people live? OMG
Please, send us some Australian care packages, we beg of you, please help us keep our Aussie, we love it dearly and dont want it to leave us.
ANZAC bikkies, Tim Tams, Tomato Sauce, we need you, we love you, please come to us.
Aussie - Over and Out